HIS FACE IN MY JOURNEY
The Prayer of Relinquishment
"What demonstrates trust is to put the thing or the person one loves best into the
Father's hands to do with as He pleases. Thus faith is by no means absent in the
Prayer of Relinquishment. In fact this prayer is faith in action."
Catherine Marshall, Beyond Ourselves
One day, as I pleaded with God for my life, I heard myself say, "for my children's sake". I was filled with
fear, sadness and dread at the thought of my children losing their mother. I was overcome with grief, as
if I had already left them. But God met me in my grief, and assured me that I didn't need to be afraid
(John 8:47; John 10:4, 27). Fear for my children was not His heart for me. "As much as you love your children,
I love them even more."
God showed me that my love for my children had become like an idol in my life, coming between us. Fear for them
was keeping me from trusting Him. And my healing was being hindered because of it. As Catherine Marshall puts it,
"Fear is a barrier erected between us and God, so that His power cannot get through to us". It was a revelatory moment.
Ultimately, God led me to relinquish my children to Him, assuring me that He
would never leave them or forsake them. Like a hovering lioness on the
defensive, I had been clenching my cubs to my bosom. But He was to be their
protector. As I released my grip, the heaviness lifted and God's love poured into my
heart, supplanting fear with peace. I no longer needed to safeguard my children. God
would care for them, and I could rest in His promise.
For mothers raising children, cancer is a terrifying beast waiting to pounce on her babes. But God is bigger than any beast. Releasing my children into the hands of the Father was the hardest thing I've ever had to do. It's devastating for a mom to let go. But, for me, it was a critical juncture that led me into a deeper level of healing and intimacy with God.